Aparador

Mainit at madilim sa loob ng kanyang pinagkukublian. Tiniis niya iyon. Tumatagaktak ang mga namuong pawis sa kanyang mukha. Ang mga luhang nag-uunahan sa paghulagpon ay walang patid sa pag-agos sa kanyang mala-anghel na mukha. Mula sa mainit at madilim na aparador na kanyang pinagkukublian ay dinig na dinig niya ang mga malalakas na boses ng mga taong nagsisigawan sa labas. Lalo niyang isiniksik ang sarili sa kasuluk-sulukan ng aparador. Takot siyang lumabas. May takot na makita siya ng mga taong nagsisigawan.

Sa murang edad ay namulat siya sa isang kakaibang kapaligiran. Isang sitwasyon na mula pa lamang sa simula ay alam na niyang may mali. Ngunit nanatiling tikom ang kanyang bibig. Ano ang magagawa ng isang musmos na gaya niya? Pilitin man niyang magsalita at harapin sila ay hindi maari. Isa lamang siyang paslit. Ano ang nalalaman ng isang anim na taong bata sa buhay?

“Anong klaseng ina ka? Hindi mo man lamang maasikaso ang sarili mong anak!” narinig niyang sambit ng lalaki na sinagot naman ng babae ng, “nagsalita ang magaling! ano ang tingin mo sa sarili mo, isang ulirang ama? mahiya ka sa sarili mo! nakakapandiri ka!”

Nakasilip siya sa maliit na siwang ng aparador na pinagtataguan niya. Nakita niya ng pagbuhatan ng kamay ng lalaki ang babae. Sampal dito, sampal duon ang inabot ng babae na ginantihan naman ng pagsuntok sa dibdib ng lalaki. Lalo siyang nakaramdam ng takot. Ngunit lalo din siyang naiyak sa pangyayaring kanyang nakita. Sa mata ng isang paslit…nakita niya sa murang edad niya kung paanong ang kanyang buhay ay mapagsakluban ng langit at lupa. Nuon at nuon din nabatid niyang natapos na ang kinabukasan ng kanyang pamilya. Nakita niya kung paanong gumuho ang kanyang pangarap kasama na ang kanyang pagkatao.

Bagamat natapos na ang unos sa kanilang tahanan ng mga sandaling yun. Nakita niyang lumisan ang lalaki at naiwang nananangis ang babae, nanatili siya sa loob ng aparador. Pinakriamdan ang paligid, pinakiramdaman ang sarili. Pinahiran ang mga luha, inayos ang mukha upang hindi mahalata ang bakas ng mga luhang dumaloy sa kanyang murang pisngi. Dahan-dahang tumayo at lumas sa aparador, lumapit sa babaeng lumuluha…

” Mama, san nagpunta si Papa? Bakit ka umiiyak?” habang pilit na isiniksik ang sarili sa bisig ng babae. Niyakap siya ng babae ng mahigpit, hinagkan sa noo sabay sabing, “Wala na si Papa mo, umalis na anak.” At muling humikbi. Ang paslit, nanatiling nakakandong sa kanyang ina, hungkag ang pakiramdam. Walang kahit ni-isang salitang namutawi sa kanyang bibig, walang luhang pumatak sa kanyang mga mata. ” Hindi ako iiyak..hindi ako iiyak…” sabi niya sa sarili….

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